My Journey to Now

My Journey to Now

Share this post

My Journey to Now
My Journey to Now
Speculation Can Kill a Relationship

Speculation Can Kill a Relationship

Especially when it has no foundation of trust under it.

Nicky's avatar
Nicky
Jan 03, 2023
∙ Paid

Share this post

My Journey to Now
My Journey to Now
Speculation Can Kill a Relationship
Share
Photo by Andrew Ridley on Unsplash

We all know the old adage about assuming. “When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me” (Oscar Wilde).

Get your facts straight before you speculate and make assumptions that can hurt. This goes for all relationships, but I’d say polyamory is especially susceptible to the downfalls of this type of thinking because, with more people involved, there is an increase in possible variables to speculate about, especially if you aren’t physically together very often.

Here are a few of my own poly examples of harmful speculation…

  • My husband is on a date with another woman, and I bet he’s going to fall in love with her and dump me.

  • If my boyfriend finds another partner, he won’t have time for me.

Keep reading with a 7-day free trial

Subscribe to My Journey to Now to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.

Already a paid subscriber? Sign in
© 2025 Nicky
Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start writingGet the app
Substack is the home for great culture

Share